“The CineMagic 8-Ball” – In Theaters 03/01/13

When so many movies are released each week and trailers often seem better than the movie itself, what should one do? In this precarious situation, we consult the The CineMagic 8-Ball (TM) to help us see through the nebulous marketing haze. Doing so just might save us all a disheartening trip to the cinema and spare us the shelling out for $7 popcorn and ridiculous concession stand prices. See what the 8-Ball says about this week’s releases…

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21 & OVER

Straight-A college student Jeff Chang has always done what he was supposed to do. But when his two best friends Casey and Miller surprise him with a visit for his 21st birthday, Jeff Chang decides to do everything he wants to do for a change, even though his important medical school interview is early the next morning. What was supposed to be one beer becomes a night of humiliation, over indulgence and utter debauchery.

There have always been films about people breaking the rules and having the wildest of nights. Between recent films like The Hangover, Project X, Take Me Home Tonight, 21 Jump Street, etc. people and kids celebrating their craziness for the sake of excess on screen has almost become a genre unto itself. But at the end of the day it’s all about taste. You want a crazy party film and aren’t partial to Animal House, Bachelor Party, Weird Science or countless others then this might be for you. But it’s tough to really push the envelope when everyone else has done it before. Pass.

The CineMagic 8-Ball says: “Signs Point to Meh

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JACK THE GIANT SLAYER

An ancient war is reignited when a young farmhand unwittingly opens a gateway between our world and a fearsome race of giants. Unleashed on the Earth for the first time in centuries, the giants strive to reclaim the land they once lost, forcing the young man, Jack, into the battle of his life to stop them. Fighting for a kingdom, its people, and the love of a brave princess, he comes face to face with the unstoppable warriors he thought only existed in legend – and gets the chance to become a legend himself.

Bryan Singer, Nicholas Hoult and Ewan McGregor, are all talented but absolutely nothing about this looks good. Not in the least. Here’s hoping we’re wrong.

The CineMagic 8-Ball says: “Outlook not good

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THE LAST EXORCISM Part II

In the continuing story, Nell Sweetzer is found terrified and alone in rural Louisiana. When she returns to the relative safety of New Orleans, Nell finds that she can’t remember large portions of the previous months, but she does know that she is the last surviving member of her family. As Nell begins the difficult process of starting a new life, the evil force that once possessed her comes back with terrible new plans for her, meaning that her last exorcism was just the beginning.

Let’s ignore the contradictory and ignorant sounding title and focus on the intriguing parts of the trailer…no really, tell us what they are because we didn’t see any. At least the poster is kind of creative.

The CineMagic 8-Ball says: “Outlook uncertain. Go with your gut

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THE SWEENEY – Limited

Armed and dangerous, the Sweeney Flying Squad are old school crime fighters enforcing the law. Led by legendary detective Jack Regan and his loyal partner, they have their own unique way of operating and always get results. With a bank heist in progress and his old enemy making a reappearance on the London crime scene, Regan will do whatever it takes to get the job done, even defying orders from his no-nonsense boss.

The CineMagic 8-Ball says: “Outlook good

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STOKER – Limited

India Stoker was not prepared to lose her father and best friend Richard in a tragic auto accident. The solitude of her woodsy family estate, the peace of her tranquil town, and the unspoken somberness of her home life are suddenly upended by not only this mysterious accident, but by the sudden arrival of her Uncle Charlie, whom she never knew existed. When Charlie moves in with her and her emotionally unstable mother Evie, India thinks the void left by her father’s death is finally being filled by his closet bloodline. Soon after his arrival, India comes to suspect that this mysterious, charming man has ulterior motives. Yet instead of feeling outrage or horror, this friendless young woman becomes increasingly infatuated with him.

The CineMagic 8-Ball says: “Signs point to WIN

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Also hitting theaters this weekend is the Ed Harris Naval thriller Phantom, the oil-based epic drama Day of the Falcon starring Antonio Banderas and Mark Strong, the commercial fishing documentary Leviathan, and the World Hunger documentary A Place at the Table. What will you be seeing? If you’ve seen any of these already, please let us know what you thought below.